“Name something you can say during Game of Thrones and sex.Why do women wear panties with flowers on them? In loving memory of all the faces that have been buried there.Why does a mermaid wear seashells? Because she outgrew her B-shells!.All she told me was, ‘The man goes on top and the woman underneath.’ For three years my husband and I slept in bunk beds.” (Joan Rivers) “I blame my mother for my poor sex life.Why do vegans give better head? They’re used to eating nuts.Did you hear about the man who ejaculated without a penis? He came out of nowhere.I just found an origami porn channel, but it’s paper view only.How many Bitcoin maxis does it take to screw in a lightbulb? “That’s not funny!” – Bitcoin maxis ( Elon Musk).Having sex in an elevator is wrong on so many levels.If I’m going to have sex, it’s going to be on my own Accord. My girlfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of her Honda Civic.69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.Why do walruses love a Tupperware party? They’re always on the lookout for a tight seal.Let’s play carpenter! First, we’ll get hammered, then I’ll nail you.I’m not a weatherman, but you can expect a few more inches tonight.Are you a trampoline? Because I want to bounce on you.Are you a campfire? Because you’re hot and I want s’more.Then I would bang you on every piece of furniture at my house. Are you an elevator? Because I’ll go up and down on you.
I lost my keys… can I check your pants?.Your body is 70 percent water… and I’m thirsty.I love my bed, but I’d rather be in yours.They say that kissing is a language of love, so would you mind starting a conversation with me?.You’re so hot, my zipper is falling for you.Is your name winter? Because you’ll be coming soon.Do you do carpeting? Because I’m looking for a deep shag.‘You’re cute’ has U in it, but ‘quickie’ has U and I together.Do you like sales? Because clothing is 100% off at my place.What did the guy say when he got caught masturbating to an optical illusion? It’s not what it looks like!.What did the clitoris say to the vulva? It’s all good in the hood!.What do you get when you mix LSD and birth control? A trip without kids.What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? Hold onto your nuts, this ain’t no ordinary blowjob.What do you get if you cross an owl and a rooster? A cock that stays up all night.What do tofu and a dildo have in common? They are both meat substitutes.What do you call a man who cries while he pleasures himself? A tearjerker.What does the receptionist at a sperm bank say as clients leave? Thanks for coming!.What goes in hard and dry, but comes out soft and wet? Gum!.What do a penis and a Rubik’s Cube have in common? The more you play with it, the harder it gets.What did the toaster say to the slice of bread? “I want you inside me.”.What’s the difference between a Greyhound terminal and a lobster with boobs? One is a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean.What’s the difference between ‘Oooh!’ and ‘Aaah!’? About three inches.What’s the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms? One is a Goodyear.Whether you need a good dirty pick-up line to text your partner, a witty joke to share with your friends, or you just love a good sexual innuendo, there are plenty of dirty adult jokes here but – you know – make sure you’re in good company. Because we all know being able to laugh about sex is the key to every lasting relationship anyway. And perhaps, you’ll even find some new sexting material. But if the adult jokes are good, they’re really good. Let’s be honest – dirty jokes can be a hit or a miss.
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